Tuesday, December 16, 2008

But What Are You Going to Do for Family?!

I just read my friend Mel's blog about her choice to not have children and nodded at her statements. I had made a comment today as my co-worker left work early (although she asked me first because she's considerate) to pick up her son as the school district got out early due to snow/ice/winter mix that one day I'm going to call in sick for my stuffed animals.

I don't have a kid. I don't have a roommate.

So under the guidelines of our sick leave I can't take any unless my parents are in the hospital, (Which I never updated - my Mom's surgeries went fabulously and her medications are reducing because of it!) so I should be able to call in sick for the basis of mental health.

Single individuals have certain expectations on them as if somehow our lives are not as significant enough because our needs are not pushed to the backburner for our child. I don't mind the flexibility that I can give my co-worker and others because I'm easy to count on as my responsibilities extend to the tips of my own fingers.

I've made the same choice though. To be selfish. I'm so selfish right now that even though I'd love a cat, I'm not adopting one because of travel plans I have that wouldn't be nice to leave a cat alone when it's trying to adjust to a new home.

One of my aunts asked me when I informed her that I would not be having children, ever. "But what are you going to do for family?!" I pointed to the exhuberant cousins and second cousins running around my Grandmother's like miniature pixies on speed and said, "I've already got the family."

And in all honesty I have friends that can be like children often, we all switch off who is the parent figure depending on who is acting like a child, but my parenting gene oozes out of me.

I know I'd be a great Mom, but I also know I'm too selfish right now.

I'm never going to give birth to a child.

But I wouldn't mind adopting one that can form full sentences of why they are angry, crying, laughing, or being a general pain.

Communcation is Key.

And my student worker B and I say. No babies.

Ceasing Ramble.

4 comments:

rachel! said...

I hear you! I've thought about getting a cat, but I'm admittedly too selfish. I love the freedom I have right now. I've even cut down on my houseplants because I want to be able to jet off without having to arrange for someone to take care of them.

My boss is also great about letting me take time off work for family (I'm off Friday to go see the Macy's exhibit downtown with my mom and nephew) and the pony.

rachel! said...

Okay, I just read this and was way too amused (especially by #11) to not come post it:


Dogs and cats are better than kids because they:

1. Eat less
2. Don't ask for money all the time
3 Are easier to train
4. Usually come when called
5. Never drive your car
6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
7. Don't smoke or drink
8. Don't worry about having to buy the latest fashions
9. Don't wear your clothes
10. Don't need a gazillion dollars for college, and
11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.

Dany said...

I couldn't agree more. I kind of always knew I didn't want kids (although all the women lately that seem to want to date me all have kids....i wonder if it's because I live "rent free?")

But now, I know I am completely selfish (although I do have a dog). I love spending money on ME (and friends). I love traveling for ME (and friends).

But I digress- I won't talk about it here on a public blog, but let's just say that the single people in Housing and Res Life get SCREWED when it comes to duty and holidays... all the other people have to say is "But my little schnookums needs to go see grandma!" Well, maybe I would like to see my family too!

Ok, I am done ranting.

geek details said...

I have kids and I still think single people get screwed. We've never really minded the husband having to work holidays so that the single people don't get entirely screwed. We've done our share of dinners at work so that he can have thanksgiving with the kids and single co-workers can go visit family.

Just because you have kids doesn't mean they'll be around later on either. We've made our life far away from extended family and we enjoy it so much more that way.